Little Blue Pill

No, not THAT one. The other one: Alli. You've probably seen those commercials on TV about how you can lose 50% more by blocking the absorption of fat globules, blah, blah, blah. Or maybe you've heard about the "treatment effects" that would have you thinking it's the Olean crisis all over again. (By the way, those fat-free chips tasted terrible.)


Actually, though, Alli works. I know this because I took it for awhile before, a few years back, when I was too naive to think that I'd ever actually gain MORE weight in the future. Ah, the heady days of our youth. Well guess what kids? I've reached critical mass - literally - and I need some assistance in the form of the FDA-approved capsule kind. Nom, nom, nom.

So tomorrow I start my lowfat eating plan and on Wednesday I'll start poppin' me some blue pills and looking forward to wearing those winter clothes that have been languishing in the "skinny" part of my closet. And if I experience any "treatment effects" don't worry - you won't hear about it on here...